from pregnant to beaten

This is my story. I lived through it and am determined to tell it to anyone that it may help. If you have ever been a victim or are a victim of abuse, I hope my stories can help you. I do not want your memories to be as vivid as your scars like mine are. Feel free to comment!

It is a nice Tuesday afternoon. The air is fresh in February. I like how the air is crisp and wind gentle. I set out to walk a block to my beloved boyfriend's house. We have been dating for five months now and I feel so comfortable with him. I owe him the world because of his kind hand when I walked away from the drug scene. He has been so sweet and caring. I could never ask for anything more.

When I arrive at his house he is playing X-box waiting on me. As soon as I get there he greets me with a kiss that makes me feel those familiar butterflies in my stomach. I could live like this forever! I don't know what I did in life to deserve him, but I am glad that I did it.

After a few games of Scattegories, our favorite game, we decide to walk back to my house and take a nap. As we walk, hands inner-laced, mt heart beats rapidly. I have never felt like this for anyone and the passed week I just have all these overwhelming feelings for him. I just know that one day we will be married.


We arrive at my house and crawl into bed for a restful nap. Days off work are so enjoyable with such good company. I fall alseep with my head on his chest in munutes. It is just so easy to get comfortable in his arms.

An hour later I awake with the worst stomach cramps I think I have ever had. I wake him and tell him that I am not feeling well. He holds my hair back as I start to throw up in the trash can beside my bed. I stay doubled over in pain crying for forty-five minutes until he says he is calling my mother.

My mother arrives at the house about thirty minutes later. She is panicky in situations that she has no control over. I can here in her voice that she thinks something is wrong. I tell her that I think I have food poisoning and I need to go to ther doctors. We are in route to the doctors office in less than five minutes.

When we arrive at the doctors there is no wait. I am crying like a child and walking on my tippie-toes from the pain. Lab is drawn from me and I am given pain medication to subdue the pain until they can figure out what is wrong with me.


Thirty minutes after the lab work was done, I am moved to another room. Everyone with me is asked to wait outside. The doctor doesn't take long to walk in. He sits down and looks me in the eye and asks me if I have had unprotected sex. I am appauled by being asked this. I tell him it is none of his business.


The doctor looks at me and says, "You're pregnant."

What!? No way! I burst into tears and say I am not ready. He lets me know that this is a little late to be thinking about things like that and that there is a possibility that I could have a tubal pregnancy. I am set up with an appointment later in the afternoon for my first ultrasound.

I walk out of the doctor's office in disbelief. My mother and boyfriend want to know what the doctor's decided was wrong. I was not sure how to let it out, but it came out. In a fast, loud way.

I had never seen a bigger smile on my boyfriend's face as when I said those words. He was elated! I was uneasy about the whole thing. I loved children and my boyfriend and pictured one day us having children. But at that exact moment, I wasn't sure if I could be a good mom.

A few hours later I was on my way to my ultrasound. My palms were sweaty and my heart was racing. I wasn't sure about what type of mother I would be, but I was quickly warming up to the idea.

Hand in hand my boyfriend and I walked into the ultrasound room eager to see what we would find. I was prepped ans the technician quickly pointed out a small blinking light that was the heartbeat. It was as small as pencil lead. For such a small thing it sure was making me feel a lot. Never did I expect that feelig a whole lot was what was going to happen for the rest of my pregnancy.

That night, after I went to sleep, I was awoken by a very beligerent boyfriend. He had a look in his eyes that I had never seen. I was confused. I had just woken up from a deep sleep to some pshycho yelling about me pissing him off.

What could I have done? I began crying and rolled over in the bed. I had no idea what was going on or why it was. That is when he set my hair on fire with a lighter. I began slapping my head and trying to get up screaming for help. I was thrown to the ground five times before I grabbed a candle and threw it at him.

All the commotion woke up my parents and they came running. My boyfriend ran out and my parents called 911. I had mixed emotions when the cops came. I though he might have been drunk or high. This wasn't like him at all. The policeman took some pictures and filed a report. that is all he said he could do.

I spent the next three house in the sink of my bathroom glued to the mirror. I could make out his handprints in my chest. He had pushed me down so hard, that I had two perfect hands on my chest above my breasts. I wondered why he hadn't called, but why would he? I knew we could get past this, at least for the baby, right? I was blind to the pain I would further endure at his hands for giving him another chance.

Until Next Time
Blondie