Red Flags

Red Flags. This is something that I have decided that I am looking at through blind eyes. After my lecture in Abnormal Psychology, I walked out stunned. I was in such deep thought about how I could miss so much, that I slammed into the wall dropping everything.

Last night, I couldn't sleep. I sat reading my chapter over and over. So many things laying on the surface that I just let brushed aside or explained away. How could I ever subconsciously think that I wasn't good enough? Somehow, I let my past still have a hold over my thinking.

I have spent so much time trying to learn from my past. In that learning I have said over and over I would never be there again, but I have gone back there. Yet I missed the all important qualities that all of my situations held.

I see now that rudeness to others, or an underlying feeling of being superior can be deal breakers if you want any respect from a man. I also learned that you can tell how a man will treat a woman by seeing him interact with his mother. The same goes for a woman with her father.

I am learning that every day I have to look up and learn. I have to be vigilant against the outside world. I will not let all of this be a lesson learned and hope that tomorrow will be better than today.

I have a broken heart, but it is my fault as much as his. He is who he is and he is entitled to live however he wants. I am, on the other hand, have to choose people with qualities that I yearn for and cannot ignore the signs that can be observed in the beginning.

Until Then,

Blondie